Hubbies: help your wives hustle
This blog is for the boys. So, dudes? Listen up!
That amazing spouse of yours is kicking it—and you love to see it. In fact, it’s probably kinda hot. She is working hard and building an amazing career; she’s taking care of you, the house, and maybe even your children. At the end of the day, she probably comes home, whips up dinner, cleans the house, and maybe even has time for a quick snuggle (or more – hehe).
You think she’s Wonder Woman! (And she is.) Let me tell you a secret: she is tired! Most days, she feels like she is on a hamster wheel. She does shit she doesn’t want to do—with a smile. Because she believes in her work and loves her family. I am fairly certain she also has a B-I-G, deep-rooted dose of guilt and a voice in her head that tells her she is letting people down.
All of this is probably news to you! She holds it together real well.
So what can you do to make that lovely love of your life feel supported?
Here are some tips to give the woman you love a bit of a break.
- Cook dinner. I’m not talking fancy pants date-dinner (though, hey, that’s always a good idea too.) But really, just the basics. Go the grocery store and buy some nice food and make dinner. It can be easy—no one ever said no to spaghetti and meatballs! And… guys: takeout is not “making dinner”. Even better pick, a night or two every week and make it a habit.
- Get friendly with the washing machine. That’s the big machine in the basement or porch—if you know how to use it, use it!!! (If not, learn how. And if you’re colour-blind, please have some one else sort. We like our whites to remain white.) See it all the way through—I’m talking wash, dry, AND fold and put away. Put on a show and go for it; if she tries to help, tell her NO!!
- Clean the path from the doorway to the kitchen and bedrooms. If there’s no mess in site, she’ll resist the urge to clean it at the end of a long day. And maybe, just maybe, relax a tad.
- If you have kids, pick them up. You are just good at hanging with the kids as she is. It would be immensely helpful to her and something you and your kids will come to enjoy. Daddy time rules!
- Give her a break! Insist that she has “me time.” She may push back. But stand your ground. If she can’t be home without doing things make her go out. Give her the gift of time.
- Clean. (Or hire a cleaner). Spending time together is way more valuable than scrubbing toilets.
- Be her cheerleader. Listen, that girl has self doubt. And, on some days, it’s gonna creep in and bring her down. Tell her what you think of her (sincerely), be a rock, hold space, and cheer loudest. Your support will get her through grey clouds.
- Keep your mouth shut, sweetie. Especially if her idea sounds crazy or if you think it’ll never fly. Smile. Be supportive. Whether she tanks or flies, her fondest memory will be of your support. She doesn’t need an opinion; she needs an ally.
- When she says “don’t worry I will take care of it”, don’t believe her.
Just take care of it for her.
These are just a few things that you can do for that amazing woman in your life. She may look like she has it all together—and maybe she does—but I am willing to bet that some of these little things could make a huge difference.