Recently a friend said to me, “I stand in my truth.” This statement has really stuck with me. Stand in my truth. It could mean many things; for me, it means being true to myself, what I know is at my core. For me, my truths are a combination of boundaries, self-believes, and needs. Yes – I know that’s a lot.
The conversation with my friend was a good reminder. The last two years I just put one foot in front of the other and did what had to be done. Sometimes I would stick to my truth, sometimes I didn’t. Honestly, it depended on what I could handle. Picking my battles came up a lot, and instead of basing my battles on me, on my core beliefs alias my truths, I based them on what was easier. It was what I had to do at the time.
Taking the easy route vs. standing in your truth
Time has passed, and I have space in me to stop and think about what my truths are – to see how and if I have been staying true to them. In some cases yes, I was standing in my truths, but in others, I was not. When I started to look at the not category, I realized it would come up when I didn’t want to deal with someone or something. I would simply tell them what they wanted to hear vs. what I really wanted to say. I actually – on purpose – kept what I wanted to say to myself since it was easier. Since when do I take the easier route? Agh, I didn’t really like that answer.
So what are my truths? This is what I am working on right now. I am making a new list for me. Life experiences change us, and it is time I revisit what I am all about. This new Gina is different in some ways – I want to get to know her.
Work in progress
I also realized yesterday that some of the things I strived so hard to change have crept back in. They are fighting for dominance, have been winning; that is NOT ok. I see it now. I have to go back and do some work. It is time to get really clear on what I am ok with and with what I am not. I also need to revisit how I come across when I am stressed (I think I have been negative lately and that is not who I am) and get some clarity on what is really important about me, for me, and what I am ok with letting go of.
Last night, I was skyping with a friend. I didn’t like the way the conversation was going and the tone, so I chose to stay true to me. I didn’t like it, and I was done. I said good night and closed my phone. I got a couple of messages after that, yet I did not respond. My truth: I am not going to allow myself to be spoken to in some ways. I could have engaged with him, explained myself and gotten into a long conversation but I didn’t. I was done for the day; I was true to me.
Standing in your truth
I am not saying don’t be flexible but choose based on what you believe in, how you want to be treated, and if you are ok with it. It’s the same question again – at what cost to me – only this time it is more about your core vs. doing something.
Do you know what your truths are? Do you stand in them? I would love to hear about it.