17 May Slay obstacles with a strong mind
Last week I realized that for the last few months Self-Doubt has been my nemesis, in the background playing havoc with me. I knew it was there but I didn’t realize how much it was screwing with me. (Man alive, it was screwing with me!) I would like to say that this was not the case. I mean, Damn it! I am doing the work and I should be past this, right?! Wrong. Self-doubt and a mind that wavers into the dark sometimes is part of life.
Everyone suffers from self-doubt. Sometimes it’s really present. Like right in front of your face unavoidable. Other times, it lurks in the shadows. All times, it can be a rabbit hole we fall into. The trick is to realize when it is happening before it spirals out of control and to do something about. Never let that punk fester!
Keep your mind strong and your resolve firm and slay self-doubt with these tips:
- Stop comparing yourself with others.
Comparison is ugly. It can really screw with. Do not use others as a test for where you are and what you are doing. Everyone has their own path and you are walking yours not theirs. So be you.
- Screw what other people are thinking.
Let go of caring about what others think. The reality of life is that everyone judges, even when they say they don’t. Most of us try not to, but we do. It’s human nature. But here’s the thing: When you worry about what others think, you hold yourself back – from being you and from doing what you want to do.
- Stop thinking about it and just do it.
The more we think about it—whatever that IT is for you—the more we can overthink it. Overthinking is a vicious cycle. It’s like idling. All the work and going nowhere. So, just get on with it. The longer you wait, the more you will doubt the decisions you make.
- Be aware.
If you’re feeling doubtful, ask yourself: What triggered this? (For me, it was my hair growing back.) Spend some time with it and look at the root cause. Journaling can be really helpful here.
- Be nice to yourself.
Studies show that there is a link between self-compassion, reduced stress, and greater life satisfaction as well as higher self esteem. So be nice. You deserve it. Stop looking for validation.The only validation you need is from yourself. Advice is one thing but if you are in the habit of constantly asking others what they think before making a decision, you maybe weakening your faith in yourself.
Here’s the deal: Life is a journey. A really bumpy journey. Self-doubt is a bump. You can either roll with it and hang on tight or let it knock you sideways. (I advise the former.) Once you realize what is going on, do something about it. And, remember you are amazing and you are the person in charge of your life. Only you.