Families and holidays can be tricky. There are thousands of articles on how to survive, and I googled some. This is the standout advice:
- Take a whiff of citrus
Come on!! Let’s get real: unless it’s citrus vodka, an orange isn’t gonna keep your drunk uncle’s antics at bay. - Walk away from your worries
Really? What are you going to do—lock the family in the basement.
Kidding!! In all seriousness, holidays are crazy, fun, stressful, and busy.
It’s going to be crazy. There’s nothing you can do about it. Here’s how to keep your shit together during the madness:
- Listen to yourself
If you don’t want to do it, don’t do it! Just because you are invited to a family dinner or event, does not mean you have to go. If you’re not feeling it, stay home. Free will, baby! - Be choosey
Spend your time with those you WANT to spend your time with, not those you feel like you have to spend time with. An obligation is never fun. The truth is: Your family can survive without you. So slip into the bathtub and give yourself some downtime. It’ll feel good, and you won’t turn into “that woman.” - Be vocal
Tell your family and your friends what you want to do. Relationships are give and take—even if it’s with mom! If you just give and don’t take, it’ll suck the holiday spirit from you. Make a list of the things you want to do and share it. The holidays are about spending time with those you love and doing things together. Do you know what you want to do? - Be a rebel; break the rules!
It’s ok if you don’t want to stand in the lineup at the mall and get the Santa picture done. You don’t have to cook the same dishes. You can start new traditions! Get some Santa hats and take a picture. Do whatever you want. One year I said “Screw it!” and cooked a roast instead of a turkey. OMG! It’s your holiday. Stop trying to please others. - Find time for you
Carve out an hour for you (just you!) every day. No exceptions. And you are not allowed to do holiday stuff!
There is no magic answer here. The holidays are a HOLIDAY! Ask yourself, what do I really want? What matters to me? Answer this question and use it as a guide to get you through.
Article originally published in FabUplus December 2016.