Raising teens (and tweens) is not for the faint of heart

Raising teens (and tweens) is not for the faint of heart

by | Jun 18, 2018 | Motherhood

Do you ever lock the car, start walking away and think, “I could keep walking”? Do you pass by your house and keep driving? I remember hearing stories about moms leaving their kids; I used to think, “How could a mom leave their kids?” I know that answer now. Sometimes motherhood is just too much.

Some days it’s just too freakin’ hard

The idea of walking away from it all is tempting, very tempting. Last weekend I found myself thinking about this. It was Sunday night after a really really long day of what felt like World War III. Finally, at about 6:30 pm, I had to remove myself before I lost my shit all together.

It was a day of extremes. The morning was great, midday was brutal, and the afternoon was somewhere in the middle. At one point, my 10-year old – who was pissed off at me because I wouldn’t let him play video games – stood in the driveway and screamed how I beat him on a regular basis. I can now laugh about it, yet at the time I wasn’t even mildly entertained.

Not going to quit Project Anti-entitlement

Project anti-entitlement is still alive in our house. Someday I just want to call it quits, it would be so much easier, yet I cannot do it. My job is to try to make them the best possible people and it may be hell right now, but I will keep at it. My challenge is keeping it together, not losing my shit over and over, and trying to stay calm – this is not one of my strong points.

Some days I want to run away from home. Some days I want to throw all the technology in the garbage. Some days I just want to say screw it and let the boys do nothing, pay video games, and just be out of my hair. This last one is so tempting, but I won’t do it.

I am in no way an expert when it comes to being a mom. I gave up looking for the manual awhile back. Honestly, I am winging it and I just keep trying.

Strategies that work for me

  1. I count a lot, in my head and out-loud.
  2. I give myself lots of time outs – just remove myself before I get too frustrated.
  3. If it doesn’t work the first couple of times, rejig it a bit, and keep trying.
  4. Have a plan, work it and stick to your guns. We are not doing our children any favours by turning them into entitled adults.
  5. Technology is a double edge sword; they need it and love it, yet it’s not always good for them. In my home it’s limited.

I love my boys – I don’t always like them and that is ok. I am not here to be their friend; I am their mom!

Here’s another tip, a good one for your hear:

On the days you feel like running away from home, once your teens (or tweens) are asleep, go in and sit on their bed. They are your heart, as much as them make you crazy, they are worth it!

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